Reaching

I need to reach for better feeling thoughts in order to change.  k so I’ve been really depressed about the whole job situation because I’m just so stressed out that I’m nowhere near any of the things I want to be doing and getting paid for.  So how do I fix this?  Ok. Ok. So…ummm…better feeling thoughts like maybe…I’m in the process of seeking out a fulfilling source of income.  At least I have an income which is better than not having an income.  At least, I’m still doing all the things I love to do like improv and singing and writing.  I can see that maybe someday I’ll receive fruits from this labor.  I haven’t ruined everything by being so inherently creative or artsy fartsy.  I won’t be stuck serving coffee forever.  And even though the fast paced environment is crazy I’m sure I’m learning valuable skills that’ll be transferable to whatever future employment comes my way.  I’m doing a lot to make my life into the vision I once had for myself.  So, isn’t life just what happens while your making all these grandiose plans?  I am more than just the job I work at.  It does not define me (unless of course it was the job that I wanted all along than please oh please go right ahead and define away).  The job that I have now allows me to be home in the middle of the week – which I much appreciate on nice days like this one.  I can write outside or go to the mall or meet with a choreographer or a creative coach and a vocal coach and so on.  I get paid tomorrow so that’s a plus.  I think I might be losing weight I’m always standing and running around.  There are other opportunities to get paid coming my way and I can find more.  Everything is cool.  Everything is great.  Plus, soon I’ll be able to add songwriter to the list of creative things I can do.  So yeah.