Scatter Brain

My brain is scattered.  All over the place are my thoughts.  What should I do with the rest of this beautiful day?  I was going to go to the Apple store and get that disc but then I started doing laundry and I can’t just leave it and come back.  So maybe later or tomorrow.  I also need to find either the sheet music or backing tracks to I Gotcha and/or figure out how to possibly do the version of Put on a Happy Face that I’d like to perform. But I also want to write those scenes I’ve been neglecting for that musical/play I’m writing but the inspiration is lacking.  I’d also like to go for a walk but I’m also kind of tired because I’ve been standing all day yet at the same time I’m hyper I guess because of the latte I had earlier.  My place is a mess too so when I got home I had the idea to spend the rest of day cleaning up which lead to the laundry.  I also want to prepare – as best I can – for that interview in which case my efforts with the one woman show are kind of aimless.  I’m meeting with this “creative coach” on Thursday because I just feel so scattered and blocked and like nothing I ever do leads to anything and I remain permanently stuck in the same rinse cycle.  (Sorry that was the laundry talking).  Oh and by lead to nothing I mean my creative efforts never lead to money.  But I suppose I’m digging myself further into the hole by pointing this out.  I should be chanting over and over that it does so that it won’t and thus changing whatever belief that’s blocking the endless stream of money, happiness and creativity.  I’m so tired.  Also, I’m not really liking the character of Amber in my play anymore and that’s why I can’t think of scenes for her.  Amber is the character in my play/musical that’s kind of like Alicia Silverstone’s character in that movie Crush (that’s the shortest explanation of her character).  The other problem with the play/musical is the same problem I’ve been having all along which is that all this back story work I’m doing is kind of leading me astray from the plot which is that they go to a singing competition.  I can’t really figure out how they decide to do this.  Oh well I’m sure it’ll come to me when I least expect it.  Speaking of back stories, my favorite thing to do at work is when someone is rude or unpleasant I enjoy creating these elaborate back stories for them which would explain why they were so rude to me in that moment and thus making me not want to reach over and smack them.   And that’s what’s on my mind.   I also really need to go grocery shopping.

About Alex Lean

I am just another dreamer trying to wake up
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